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Saturday, January 23, 2010

A snippet of prologue

It's not the whole thing, just a bit.

You'll probably wonder why I needed it so badly. The truth is that without it, the story just doesn't feel quite like the one I wanted to write.

(This is for my middle grade: The Seven Tales of Trinket)

A Story Begins

My father was a teller of tales. It runs in the blood I think, for never have I loved anything so much as a story.

Except for my mother, of course.

I loved her well.

Her death was the worst thing I’d ever known. Worse even than when my father left and never came back, for I was so small I scarcely knew him.

But it was my mother’s last breaths that begin this story, for each story must have a beginning. That is the first thing a storyteller must learn.





It goes on a bit longer, but you get the idea.

hrh

22 comments:

Shannon O'Donnell said...

I love it. But now I want to know more. So many questions! If the goal is to keep us reading, you hit the target! :-)

Sarah said...

Ooh, I'm intrigued!

Thanks for sharing :)

Tricia J. O'Brien said...

I know prologues are out of favor, but I think this works because it is about a storyteller and she (I think it's she) is setting up the tale. I like the feeling of it and am intrigued by her life beginnings.

Unknown said...

Well, I'm hooked. I think it's a great prologue!

Kim said...

Tricia took the words right out of my 'keyboard.' It totally works b/c it's about a storyteller. It definitely gets me hooked. And, how perfect a story is this for our very own Story Queen??!?!

Jackee said...

Oh the tension and intrigue! I think you might be right about this prologue, though from such a little piece it's hard to tell. I'm excited to see more. Great job!

storyqueen said...

Shannon-Thank you!

Sarah-Not as intriguing as Italian girdles (I'm sure), but I work with what I've got.

Tricia-Yes, it's a she. Still toying with it a bit, but am glad that it works so far.

Nisa-Thank you!

Kim-Well, I guess the secret is out...Story Queen=Lover of Stories!

Jackee-Glad the tension came through. I thought Trinket needed to share a bit of her inner conflict before she shares her tales.

Kelly H-Y said...

Oh my goodness ... I got chills ... I want to read more!!!!!

Corey Schwartz said...

Wow. Definitely intriguing. (And I happen to be a fan of prologues in general)

Myrna Foster said...

Thank you for sharing a bit of your prologue. It made me want to read more, and that's what you want at the beginning (whether you have a prologue or not).

Emma (the Expat) said...

I just discovered your blog, and it sounds like you may just have the coolest job EVER. I'll definitely be checking out your books.

Anonymous said...

I think it's great. I want to read the whole book. :o)

Carrie Harris said...

Oooooh. It sounds very epic!

Susan R. Mills said...

Very nice. Great hook.

Sherrie Petersen said...

That's a beautiful opening, Shelley! I want to read more...

Stephanie Faris said...

I know I'm no agent, but I think prologues DO have a place in fiction. And I think yours works very well. I've taken prologues out of my fiction since reading that anti-prologue blog, but sometimes I just want a prologue, darn it. And I sure read quite a few in published books, especially in romance.

Casey Something said...

Ooo I like it, Shelley!

lisa and laura said...

Totally hooked. Very well-written. Thanks for sharing. Please sir (er...m'am), can I have some more?

I haven't had any wine either...that's just lack of sleep talking.

storyqueen said...

Kelly-Chills? Really? I'm blushing.

Corey-Yea Corey! Power to the prologue!

Myrna-Thanks! And I think I subconsciously got the idea for posting about prologues from reading your similar struggle!! Thanks for the inspiration.

Chutzpah-Thanks for stopping by, come back any time!! (And, yes the job is cool, exhausting but cool.)

Niki-Thank you! (And the rest of the book is even better, at least I think so.)

Carrie-Actually, not incredibly epic in a save-the-world-from-zombies kind of way. It's a softer story, a kind of finding out who you really are inside kind of story.

Susan-Thank you. I never thought of it as a hook before, but I 'spose it is!

Sherri-Thanks! Maybe I'll post more soon...

Steph-See, that's what I'm talking about. I like a good prologue!!

Casey-Thank you!

L and L-Ah yes, sleep deprivation. (I had to spell check deprivation...that's how sleep deprived I am!)

Elana Johnson said...

It's simply gorgeous! You have a way with words, my friends. Write on! (I would read on and on.)

MG Higgins said...

I think you're perfectly justified in making this a prologue. And anyway, it's so intriguing, even if an editor says it has to go, it's done its job by pulling them into the story.

Julie Dao said...

Beautiful opening. I would 100% want to keep on reading. Thanks for sharing! :)