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Tuesday, February 22, 2011

I am a Big Faker....

Sometimes, I wonder if I even deserve to be a writer.

What if people find out what a fake I am?

I mean....there are literary classics that I hated (sorry, Herman Melville, I just couldn't get into the whole Captain Ahab thing.....and Nathaniel Hawthorne, well, at least The Scarlet Letter was kind of short) and worse, there are literary classics that I haven't yet read (I can't even put this in a regular-sized font....Pride and Prejudice*). I write only the stuff I feel like writing, and when it gets tough, I just get up and have a non-healthy snack or something. No important stuff flies from my fingertips on to my outdated laptop. Just stuff that amuses me. And speaking of outdated computers, I've got no twitter, no facebook, no I-pod upon which to create my playlist......What in the world makes me think I can or should be an author?

And yet, here I am, still chasing the dream. Still writing my books because there is nobody that says I can't. And I guess that is my message today, to myself as much as anyone. There IS nobody who says you can't.

Only yourself.

And as long as you can sit down with the blank page, just the two of you, and create something where moments before there was nothing, then you are a writer. As long as put the time in typing the words, learning from the mistakes, trying everyday to make the words string together more beautifully than the day before, you are a writer. As long as the ideas in your head create an undeniable urge to touch pen to paper, regardless of how messy and wild that writing may be, you are a writer.

So, um, that's where I am today. Hope the words help you if you find yourself in the same spot.

hrh

*Here's the dilemma with P and P. What if I read it and hate it? Then I'll just looks like one of those hoity-toity "Oh, Jane Austen is so bourgeoius" people or something like that. Sure, I'll probably like it...but my expectations are HUGE. I mean, it's just about everybody's favorite book. So, that is why I choose to remain ignorant. It's supposed to be bliss, right?

14 comments:

Unknown said...

See, here I was thinking we could be friends and then you go and tell me you haven't read P&P. But I understand the sentiment. At *least* go watch the 1995 BBC Colin Firth version.

He wears a wet shirt at one point.

Kelly Polark said...

Keep amusing me. I love your books.
And I only just read P&P last year because I wanted to read it before I read Prada & Prejudice.

Shannon O'Donnell said...

Shelley, I just bought my daughter Good Night, Good Knight and we giggled our way through it together. She loved it. I loved it. And YOU are the real deal! :-)

Catherine Denton said...

<3 <3 <3 this post! Your words most definitely encouraged me. All we need is pen and paper.

Tricia J. O'Brien said...

Faker??? Not!!!
Seriously, you have magic in your words and good advice in this post. I'm sure gonna keep stringing words together.

Myrna Foster said...

For what it's worth, my kids and I love your books. But you should totally read P&P, or you could read Persuasion or Sense and Sensibility, if reading one of the others would make it less of a let down.

Sherrie Petersen said...

You are so not a faker! But I totally relate to the sentiment :)

Sharon K. Mayhew said...

You are so not a faker! I love Good Night Good Knight! And can't wait for your mg to come out. :) Just because you're not into tweeting ipadding doesn't mean you're not all that!

I only read books that I want to, I kind of rebel when it comes to the "classics." I don't like being told what I should think are classics...

Carla said...

You definitely have magic...we LOVE the Knight books! Also, I think the biggest reason I liked P&P was because I was a teenager and thought it was so romantic!

Carla

Stina said...

That is exactly why I didn't take any English lit classes in university. ;)

Ruth Donnelly said...

LOL! Great post, Shelley. Also, what if you read it and love it? Then you're just, you know, one of the crowd. Where's the uniqueness? You can't win. :)

Lydia Kang said...

Do what Karen says. Watch the BBC version with Colin Firth. He is...just...so...(*can't finish sentence because Lydia melts into the carpet*)

I forgive you for not reading P and P. After all, who's read ALL the classics?

storyqueen said...

Karen-It's on my list. And I actually love the story of P and P, seen the movie and all, and my eldest daughter LOVES the book....I am just afraid I've built it so big in my head it can't possibly live up.

Kelly-I think I'll break down and give it a try this summer...

Shannon-Oh, thank you! Glad it gave you giggles.

Catherine-Pencil, paper and a spine of steel!

Tricia-Thank you. You are an awesome word-stringer.

Myrna-That might be the safest way to go...Hmmm...

Sherrie-Thanks. But yes, I am a big, fat faker.

Sharon-Rebels, unite!

Carla-Thank you for stopping by! And I am glad you liked the book. Looks like I am going to have to try P and P. I am a sucker for a good love story.

Stina- Shhhhh. Me either....hehehe.

Ruth-See? You are absolutely right. I cannot win. I should just accept the fact and read it already.

Lydia-Yes, I am going to watch it. I think my eldest put it in the Netflix queue already. Preparing to melt.

Lola Sharp said...

I love so many things about this post.

I feel confident saying that most of us have our guilty 'faker' secrets: classics we haven't read or didn't care for, parts of the writing process that make us walk away and eat Pop Tarts and Doritos. (in truth, I eat those things when the writing is going well, too)

Eh, just watch the P & P and S & S movies. The BBC and the major movie versions are all good.

Happy weekend, Shelley.
Hugs,
Lola